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Bodega Bay 29
This
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Bodega Bay
by Nick
Chapter Twenty Nine The
gasp was loud. I know because it came out of me as I sat straight up in my bed.
I covered my face with both of my hands, cupping them over my nose as I took a
deep breath and gathered my senses. I used the ends of my middle fingers to
wipe the sleep from the corners of my eyes, then baby lolitas nude models I looked around slowly, trying
to let my eyes get used to the darkness that surrounded me. The shadows on the
wall and floor were a cruel reminder of the nightmare I had just been having,
and as if to try to block child lolitas 7y 12y them out of my view, I reached over and turned my
lamp on.I gave
my eyes a full minute to let myself get re-acclimated to the light before I
hung my feet over the side of the bed and leaned back against my hands. The
time on my alarm clock german top model loli said it was only 11 p.m. and I could still hear the
sound of the television coming from the living room, a sure sign that my dad
was up watching the news. I slid off the side of my bed and walked to my door,
which was partially open, then down the hall to the bathroom to drain my aching
bladder.When I
was finished, I walked out to the living room, where sure enough, my dad was
sitting alone on the couch with his feet propped up on the coffee table,
watching the news. He looked so lonely. There was a time in the no so distant past when he would have been sitting in front
of the news with my stepmom on his arm, but asian lolita pic top those days were over. I couldn’t
help but blame myself for that, even if it was his choice to walk away from
her.”Hey
bud,” he said with a warm smile when he saw me. “I thought you were asleep.”"I
was,” I said with a yawn as I took a seat next to him and curled my feet up
underneath my body for warmth and leaned into him. “I had to go to the
bathroom.”"Is
that all?” he asked knowingly, and I resignedly shook my head no.”I had
a bad dream,” I said with another child lolitas 7y 12y sleepy yawn. “You
want to talk about it?” he asked, and I sighed loudly and shook my head again. “I
want to forget about it,” I said quietly, and I was telling the truth. “It was
stupid anyway.”"As
long as you’re okay, buddy,” he acquiesced, giving me a firm squeeze around the
shoulders. “Do you want to sit with me for a little while?”I
nodded my head and closed my eyes again. When I reopened them, I was in my own
bed, reaching for my alarm clock which baby lolitas nude models had gone off. I sat up and scratched my
head, realizing that I hadn’t been in my bed when I fell asleep last and
wondering to myself how many hours it had been since my dad put me back in my
bed. I shuffled to the bathroom and started the shower, got the water temperature
just right, then I got in and leaned against the wall for a few more minutes of
sleep while the warm water cascaded off my back.Thirty
minutes later I was at the table, sitting in front of a bowl of Coco Pebbles
and a piece of toast with strawberry jam spread across the top. I stirred my
cereal around a child lolitas 7y 12y
little and picked at my toast, but I wasn’t really hungry. In
fact, as the details of my nightmare came back to me, I felt sick to my
stomach. “What’s
the matter, Kevin?” I heard my dad say from across the table from me. “Don’t
you feel good?”"No,”
I said, putting my spoon down and looking across the table at my dad, feeling
almost guilty. “Dad, I’m not hungry right now.”"Do
you have a fever?” he asked, getting up from his chair and walking around to my
side of the table, where he felt my forehead and cheeks. “You don’t feel warm.”"I
just don’t feel good,” I said nauseously . “I don’t think I’m sick, though.”"Do
you want something else kiddo?” he asked in a concerned voice. “Maybe a piece
of dry toast?”"No,”
I said, pushing my bowl toward the center of the table. “I think I’m just going
to skip breakfast today, dad.”I got
up from the table and started to walk to the couch, but the instantaneous
watering of my mouth told me to head to the bathroom, and it was a good thing I
did. As soon as I walked through the door, I heaved
up the little bit of cereal I had managed to eat, missing the toilet by about
six inches and splattering the wall with my vomit. Skipping
school wasn’t my preference. In fact, I wanted to go. My dad wasn’t
having it, though. He called my grandma, who promptly arrived and took over for
him so he could keep a few appointments. “I’ll
be home early, okay buddy?” he said, leaning down to kiss my forehead. “I love
you.”"I
love you too, dad,” I said, watching as he stood up from the edge of my bed and
walked to the door, which he left open in case I needed to call for my grandma.
As
soon as he was out the door, my grandma came in my room with a small cup of
Seven-Up, which she placed on my night stand as she sat on the edge of my bed
and felt my forehead. “How
are you feeling, honey?” she asked softly with a warm russian pedo lolita nymphet
smile.”A
little better,” I said, returning her smile and realizing how lucky I was to
have ended up living as close to my grandparents as I had. “I could have gone
to school.”"It’s
better to be safe than sorry,” she said, patting my stomach gently. “Do you
think you want to move out to the living room?”"Maybe
in a little bit,” I said. “My tummy’s still a little lolita pics board post underage bbs lolita collection woozy.” “Ok,
sweetheart,” she said, starting to get up.”Grandma?”
I said, causing her to sit back down and look at me questioningly. “I miss
living with you and grandpa.”"Well
we miss having you Kevin,” she said quietly. “You know, grandpa and I have had
to get used to not having you and daddy around all the time.”"Sometimes
I wish we russian pedo lolita nymphet still lived with you guys,” I said. “Well
it’s all for the best,” she said, standing up. “You call for me if you need
anything, okay honey?”"Okay,
grandma,” I said with a grin that she returned.Lying
alone in my room gave me time to think about a lot of things. My mind was
drifting, and my thoughts were out of my control. Normally, if I was dwelling
on something that made me feel bad, I could change my train of thought and in
an instant, all was well again. But the thoughts that swirled through my head
that morning were making me feel worse than bad, so I pulled german top model loli my pillow out from
under my head and put it over my face in an attempt to block out the sunlight
that was making me consciously aware of my situation.__________________________________________________________________________ “I
heard you were sick today,” she said, smiling at me as I took a seat next to little lolita sex pics
my
dad on the comfortable brown leather couch that faced her desk. My counselor
Georgia was a soft speaker with a relaxing young lolitas in italy
smile and a calm demeanor. At
times I found it hard to hear what she was saying, almost as if she were
whispering, but I wouldn’t say she was a bad communicator. In fact, she was
probably better at it than anyone I knew of. She had a way of getting me to
talk about my feelings in a way that I didn’t think I was capable of doing, and
my dad also seemed to be more willing to open up around her.
I think seeing her might have been a little
awkward at first, but we ultimately eased into our sessions with her.”I
have a stomach ache,” I said quietly. “I’ll be okay, though.”"I
hope so,” she said quietly, marking something in her notepad. I tried to get a
glimpse of what she was writing one day, but it all looked like chicken
scratch. I asked my dad about it and he laughed and said it was called short
hand. I told him it looked more like hieroglyphics, bringing another chuckle
out of him.”I had
to stay home from school again,” I griped, propping my arm on the armrest and
resting the side of my head lazily on top of my forearm. “Well
if you’re not feeling good it was probably good to take a day off,” she said
without looking up from her notes. “So what would you like to talk about
today?”"I’d
like to mention something,” my dad said out of the blue. “Kevin had a nightmare
last night that he didn’t want to talk about.”I
sighed and turned my head so I could flash a dirty look at my dad, who looked
unfazed by my glare. If anything, he looked concerned, but I wanted his concern
to subside. If there was one thing I didn’t want to talk about, it was the
memory that had revisited me during my sleep the night before.”Well
why don’t we talk about that,” Georgia said matter of factly, still taking
notes but looking up from the page she was writing on. “Do we
have to?” I asked bitterly, knowing that she’d find a way to get it out of me.
Only this time, I was going to fight her tooth and nail because I wanted it to
go away. It had to.”No,”
she said quietly. “We can talk about anything you want to talk about, Kevin.
Let’s talk about something that makes you feel good.”I let
out a sigh of relief and started talking to her about my toolbox. I told her
about swimming with Mark, Justin and his brother and about the plans my dad and
I had to rebuild the fence in our backyard. Then, as if I had no control over
what I was saying, I mentioned the phone conversation with my mom. In no time I
was reduced to tears as I relayed the feelings of betrayal that I felt when I
figured out pre teen lolitas movies that she was going to visit Billy in prison. “Do
you think your mom stopped to consider how this makes you feel?” she asked, and
I nodded tearfully. “Of
course she did,” I said between sniffles. “She didn’t want to tell me what she
was doing there, but she knew she didn’t have to. God I hate her.”"Do
you really mean that?” Georgia asked, and I shook my head slowly, letting out a
long, drawn out cry as I did. I felt my dad scoot closer to me and wrap his arm
around me, pulling naked preteen lolitas models me into him for comfort, but the pain I felt in my heart
seemed irreparable. “I
don’t know how she could just free little lolita galleries do this,” I sobbed. “After everything that
happened. Why?”"We
may never know, Kevin,” she said quietly, and that was it. She didn’t offer up
a defense of my mother’s actions. She didn’t remind me that she had mental
instabilities that were out of her control. She didn’t say that I should learn
to forgive my mom for her newest betrayal. Instead,
we moved on to a different topic.Sex
isn’t something I like to talk about with certain people. In the presence of my
dad and a woman, though, I get really uncomfortable. The thing is,
though, I got a pass the week before. Georgia never brought up the dildo, but I
was positive my dad had mentioned it to her. He had to of.Instead
of the dildo incident, we talked about my trip to the day spa with Richard and
my Aunt Christina. I bragged a little bit about my make over and talked about
wanting to be a little more open about my gayness. In all, it was a rather
relaxing session, and I went home confident that I was off the hook about the
dildo and my trip to the emergency room.I’d
definitely been caught off guard by Georgia this time. I knew that it was no
coincidence that she didn’t actually say she wanted to talk about sex with me.
Instead, she came around lolita pics board post
to the subject in a manner that made the change in
subject seem natural.”I’d
like for you to be open and honest with me, Kevin,” she said. “By doing that,
you can be open and honest with yourself and others about an array of topics.
Doesn’t that sound liberating?”"Not
really,” I said plainly. “But I guess I can try.”"Talk
to me about the first time you ever thought about sex,” she said, and I know my
brow furrowed. “I
don’t know,” I shrugged. “I don’t remember the first time I thought about it.”"Was
it with Billy?” she asked bluntly, and I shook my head. We had talked about
Billy so much that the mention of his name and what had happened between us no
longer had any lolita pics board post shock value with me. “Do
you think it was the time you found out that your little brother had been
abused?”"No,”
I said uneasily, thinking back in my mind to what I could have honestly pointed
to as my first exposure to sexual thoughts. “I think it was when I was at
school.”At
that moment, I felt underage bbs lolita collection like I had turned a key, and when I did, an old memory came
back to me. I sat still, letting the moment linger, and all of the sudden, I
realized what I had stumbled across. The moment was so vivid in my mind, yet it
had faded to black for almost a year before that. I put my hands on my temples
and released a loud breath as the sick to my stomach feeling came rushing back
to me and I knew right away what my nightmare meant and how it related to what
we were talking about at the moment.I
turned and looked at my dad guiltily, soaking up his worried expression, then
back at Georgia, who nodded knowingly at me, and I young lolitas in italy
knew I was in a world of
trouble.__________________________________________________________________________ Dinner
that evening was quiet. I could barely look my dad in the eye, much less carry
on a conversation with him. I just pushed the food around on my plate because I
couldn’t handle food at the moment. Finally he excused me from the table, and I
went straight to my room and got ready for bed,I
didn’t make it out to the living room that night to tell him good night. He had
to come to my room instead, and the look on his face told me that he was
searching for an explanation I couldn’t give him preteen lolitas nude pics lolita em cartoon 3d
yet. If I had known how, I
would have done it in an instant. He sat
on the side of my bed and caressed my face gently, then he scooted me over and
crawled in next to me. I instinctively rolled over so that I was curled up to
his side and I thought about becoming the man that he was. It was a mighty task
to pre teen lolitas movies
complete, I knew, especially because I was gay. But there was no one else in
the world I wanted to be like. “You
know something, Kevin,” he said softly. “There’s nothing in the whole wide
world that you can’t tell me. I’ll always be here for you.”"No
matter what?” I asked meekly, a feeling of dread consuming my already nauseous
stomach.”No
matter what, kiddo,” he said, then he kissed me on the lips and said, “I love
you so much, son. That’s never going to change. Nothing, no matter what, is
going to change between us.”With
that, he got up and pulled my covers up to my chest. I watched him as he walked
to my window, making sure it was shut and latched, and I felt like he was a
giant that towered over me. I also
took him at his word, though. If my dad said something, he meant it. I sighed
and sat up before he hit the light.”Dad?”
I said, and he turned, his face registering the same concern it did in
Georgia’s office. “Yes
Kevin,” he said, cracking his knuckles nervously as he approached my bed again.”I
just wanted to tell you that I love you,” I said, realizing I’d chickened out
of what I wanted to tell him. Without a word he sat back down on my bed and
wrapped his long arms around me, pulling me in for a tight hug that lasted for
more than a minute. When he let me go, he kissed my forehead and guided me back
down to my pillow and pulled the covers back up to my chest again. Then he
walked out of my room.As I
lay still on my bed, I let my mind take me back to the day I first found out
that there were sexual pleasures that I could enjoy. School was out and I was
going to walk home, but before I did, I made my usual round to the Kindergarten
rooms where I knew I’d find my little brother. His face lit up when he saw me,
and he ran up to me to show me the face he’d made with cotton balls and glue
against dark red construction paper.”It
looks like Santa Clause,” he said, handing it to me to see. “Daddy’s late
again, as usual.”That
was true. My dad was always late picking my little brother up from school, but
my stepmom was in class and there was no one else to do it. That was why I
liked to walk to his classroom when pre teens 12 lolita the bell rang to let us out. I would have
to cross the naked preteen lolitas models busy intersection with him if I were to walk him back to my dad
and step mom’s house, and they didn’t preeteen girld model loli think I was quite old enough to do it
safely yet. Plus,
going to his classroom after school to wait for my dad with him gave me the
opportunity to see my dad without having to deal with my stepmom. One thing
that was different about being there that afternoon was the substitute teacher
sitting at his regular teacher’s desk I recognized him from the times he’d
substituted for my teachers, and when he saw me, his face lit up.”Hi
Mr. Kessler,” I said, waving at him. “My dad should be here soon.”"There’s
no hurry,” he said with a friendly look. “So what grade are you in this year
Kevin?” “Fifth,”
I bragged, taking a seat at an activity table. “I’ll be eleven in April.”"Wow,
I can remember when you were in first grade,” he said, getting up and walking
over to the table to sit with us. “You’re definitely a much bigger boy than I
remember.”And
that’s when it happened. At the time, I thought it was nothing underage bbs lolita collection
more than
playful tickling. Looking back, though, it was glaringly obvious what was
happening. I giggled because I thought it was so funny, and I thought nothing
of watching him tickle my little brother the same way. In fact, I thought
nothing of doing it to him myself. Mr. Kessler was so blasť about it that it
seemed to be all in fun.I had
to find a way to move past the moment I was trapped in, but my guilty mind
wouldn’t let me. I had tears streaming down my face, drenching my pillow when
the reality hit me, underage bbs lolita collection and I realized what I was guilty of. I just knew that as
soon as I told russian pedo lolita nymphet my naked preteen lolitas models dad everything around me would disappear, just like it always
had before. I shook my head and told myself that I was just having another
nightmare, but when I sat up in my bed, I knew it was real. All of it.I
needed to do something. Anything. I couldn’t just sit there in my hardcore latina lolita love bed and
wonder what was going to happen. I had to be proactive, so I got up and walked
out to the living room, which was surprisingly quiet. The TV was off and my dad
was nowhere to be found. That meant he was in bed, so nude lolitas 12 14 I crept quietly through
the house and for reasons I couldn’t explain, I found myself in the pool room. I
turned the light on and looked around. Considering the temperature outside,
which had dipped into the low forties, the room was pretty warm. I took a
lounge chair and rested my head against the back of it, taking in the smell of
chlorine that lingered in the air around me and listening to the low hum of the
pump as it filtered the water.Finally,
I got up and walked out to the pool, looking into the water and taking in my
reflection. I took a seat on the edge and dipped my feet in the warm water and
thought about how my life had evolved. It didn’t take long for preeteen girld model loli an uneasy
feeling to creep over me when I realized what was at stake.If
there was one thing I could be accused of in my life, it’s that I dwell on
things. When I was little and living with my mom, I used to feel bitter about
the life I knew I’d never have. I created scenarios in my mind that little lolita sex pics weren’t
realistic because I couldn’t stop thinking about what I wished I had. I was
certain, though, that things would never change.Then
my dad married my stepmom and things went from bad to worse. The small haven of
sanity I had was gone, replaced by my step mom’s hateful antics toward me.
Still, I persevered and swore not to let her keep my dad away from me, or vice
versa. Then
came that fateful phone call. It destroyed me in so many ways to learn that my
dad didn’t want to see me anymore, and all I could do was move on. I pretended
that everything was okay, and on the surface, it was. But the truth be told, it
was never okay. If someone had looked below the surface of my home life they
would have been appalled, especially if they would have found out that my mom
was dating a convict up for parole.When
Billy got out, I think I wanted to make myself believe that I was going to be
okay. He seemed to be interested in teaching me how to become a man, and I was
desperate for some kind of positive male role model in my life. As soon as my
mom thought he was spending too much time with me, though, she told him my
deepest, darkest secret and his interest in me changed for the worst.But I
got away. I made
a run for it, and when I did, my life changed. It was difficult at first, to
say the least. I naked preteen lolitas models
knew I could have been killed or maybe met a worse fate than
living with my mom and Billy. But I didn’t. Instead, things turned around in
such a positive way that even in my wildest dreams, I wouldn’t have predicted
such an outcome for me. Finally,
my life was everything I wanted it to be.I let
my feet stay in the warm water, but I leaned back and let my back rest against
the Astro Turf, closing my eyes to concentrate on my
next move. I was still in shock, but at the same time, I was panicking more
than anything. My mind started to drift again, back to the day I walked to my
little brother’s classroom, but this time I felt a nudge on my shoulder.”Kevin?”
I heard a worried voice say, snapping me out of my slumber. “What are you doing
here at this time of night?”If you like what you’ve read, go check out my hosted page at Gay Authors
by clicking here:
The Official Home of Nickolas
James
While you’re there, don’t forget to VOTE little lolita sex pics for my site
You can german top model loli also leave your thoughts in my forum by clicking here: Stories at Gay
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You can also email my at Nicksstorypagegmail.com
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